Sinéad O’Connor felt “on fire” when she sang but despised the music business.
The tragic performer, found dead in London on 26 July in London after relocating to the city from her native Ireland to polish off what turned out to be her last album, said she wrapped herself in a “character” when singing.
She said in quotes from her brutally honest 2021 autobiography ‘Rememberings’ – in which she detailed years of abuse at the hands of her mum and her mental health struggles – that have resurfaced since her shock passing: “I’m on fire when I’m singing, I’m completely in character. I use my sense memories, and every syllable of it is meant.
“It’s a very special thing.
“I'm not a pop star. I’m just a troubled soul who needs to scream into mikes now and then.”
Sinéad also said in a 2021 interview: “When I sing, it’s the most solitary state: just me, and the microphone, and the holy spirit.
“It’s not about notes or scales, it’s all about emotion.”
Despite her love of singing, the mum-of-four – whose death came 18 months after the suicide of her 17-year-old son Shane – hated her industry.
She told Time magazine: “The music business is a spiritually corrupt arena. It’s full of nothing but vampires and pimps, honestly.
“You couldn’t understand it unless you were in it. The only way to survive it is to love music.”
Sinéad added in her memoir: “‘Success’ was making a failure of my life. Because everyone was already calling me crazy for not acting like a pop star. “For not worshipping fame… no one ever asked me what my dreams were; they just got mad at me for not being who they wanted me to be.
“My own dream is only to keep the contract I made with God before I ever made one with the music business.
“And that’s a better fight than murder. I gotta get to the other side of life.”
