DEAR MISS MANNERS: Hey there! As a mother of two children who have married in the last year, I am advising people who complain about registries and decide to send their own idea of a “thoughtful” gift to NOT do that.
This generation is different, and they do not appreciate people giving them gifts they “think they should have.” It offends them when people do not respect their wishes. Stick to the registry, please!
I can attest to a carload of “gifts” that were taken to charity. Both my children sent handwritten thank-you notes, but in their small apartments or tiny starter homes, they had no need or place for things people thought they should have. Off to charity those gifts went.
Just my perspective after two weddings.
GENTLE READER: What about the perspective of those whose attempts at thoughtfulness you deride and reject? “Just shut up and do my shopping” is a sentiment unlikely to inspire further generosity.
But, hey -- thank you for the charity donations and for teaching your children to write letters of thanks.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
