DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m a 32-year-old electrical engineer. My high school physics teacher passed away recently and, as you may imagine, he played a massive role in my pursuing a career in engineering.
I never met his wife or kids, and I live overseas, which meant I couldn’t attend the funeral and meet them there. I would like to send them a handwritten letter, but I’m not sure what to say. I believe it’s partly thanks to him that I’m very successful in my field and I have an overall happy life, but I don’t want to gloat.
Should I just tell them he inspired me and that he will be missed, or should I add more?
GENTLE READER: Attributing your success to this teacher’s guidance is not boastful; it is appreciative and charming. As long as you do not turn the letter into a personal resume -- or financial disclosure -- and keep it focused on your mentor’s role in your flourishing career, Miss Manners thinks it relevant and proper.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
