The Real Housewives of Miami have dealt with all kinds of challenges in their lives. Some of the stories Alexia Nepola has to tell about her life leave her co-stars in disbelief. Sadly, she was dealt some heart-wrenching news this Spring she says she never expected. In the midst of her split, a relationship expert tells Reality Tidbit five top tips to take on board in a healing journey like Alexia’s.
After being told her marriage was being “dissolved” this April, The Real Housewives of Miami‘s Alexia Nepola was “blindsided.” The “heartbreaking” news came as a “shock” to the reality TV star. She took a break away from her podcast with Marysol Patton, before returning and “speaking out” in Ay Por Favor’s latest episode.
Relationship expert’s tips for Alexia: Suspend judgment
First things first, relationship expert and NY Times Bestselling Author, Marriage Coach, and Empowered Wife Podcast Host Laura Doyle says it’s best to “suspend judgment.”
Considering Alexia states they still love each other, Laura explains: “Whether he moved out or found someone else, it is a harrowing betrayal. It hurts. But he didn’t do it to hurt you. He did it because something was missing in your marriage.
“If you can set aside this betrayal and the hurt for the moment and stay focused on the goal of saving your marriage, you’ll give yourself a huge advantage.”
Tip #2: Make every meeting a date
Speaking on Ay Por Favor this April, Alexia explained how she was feeling “lost” amid the “painful” breakup, adding how she’s “just getting through it.”
To push through the healing journey, Laura says: “Make every meeting a date: If you see him—even if it’s at the divorce attorney’s, the marriage counselor’s, or just to hand off the kids—pretend it’s a date. Dress up! Let him open the door and thank him with a sweet smile. Have some fun with it.”
Tip #3: Listen
On the subject of Alexia and Todd’s broken marriage being salvaged, Laura says “listening” is key.
After her five-year marriage came to an end, Alexia and Marysol agreed they’re “fixers” but the RHOM star said she was “disappointed” at how things ended with Todd.
The RHOM star says she wants to continue speaking to Todd from a place of love.
“Instead of telling him how hurt and upset you are, consider being on the quiet side and giving him the space to talk by providing emotional safety—no anger, judgment or tears. One woman did this at her marriage counseling sessions, and her husband said, ‘I keep waiting for you to interrupt me but you’re not!’ She just smiled. It wasn’t long before he moved back home.”
Tip #4: Self-Care
During the “heartbreaking” hard times Alexia is currently enduring, self-care is a top priority.
“I can’t stress this one enough. It’s an indispensable step to reclaiming what’s rightfully yours: a gratifying life with a monogamous, playful, passionate marriage. Often, we neglect ourselves when we’re in pain, but this is the time to prioritize self-care.”
Tip #5: Establish a Support System
Speaking on Ay Por Favor, Alexia thanked her best friend, Marysol, for being her “rock” as well as more people around her for their support.
Laura says its crucial to “establish a support system” around during these times.
“Start by changing your internal monologue. Wallowing in self-pity only reinforces all the hurtful things you want to say the next time you see him. Halting that mental loop can seem impossible when you’re feeling so heartbroken. If that’s the case, go back to step 4 and practice self-care! Plus, The biggest detriment to taking care of yourself–and to saving your marriage? Naysayers. Surround yourself with people who are genuinely rooting for you.”
Laura adds: “Every journey of healing is unique, and given that Alexia and her husband still love each other, they may reconcile and save their marriage.”
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