A man on Reddit fears his marriage might be “ruined” after he made an off-handed comment to his wife about divorcing her.
“I’ve been married to my wife Jen for a little over seven years now. Up until about two years ago, things were great. However, a disastrous move, a few family emergencies, and a totaled car have left us in a terrible financial situation. All our savings are pretty much gone, 401Ks empty, and we’re hemorrhaging money,” he wrote.
The man explained he and his wife are “both underpaid” at their jobs. And even though they bought a “nice three-bedroom house” years ago with the idea of having kids, that dream hasn’t yet become a reality.
“Last December, I told Jen one of two things needed to happen: We either sell the house or start making more money. The latter would most definitely mean finding new jobs that would pay us a market rate. Jen pushed back on this because she loved the house and her current job. I told her she had to choose one and couldn’t have it both ways and after a week of arguing, she agreed we would look for new jobs,” he recalled.
Things got worse when the man landed a new job with a $35,000 raise, while his wife was turned down for a raise at work.
“When I came home Friday and told her I got the job, she got pissy because I clarified this does not mean she can stay at her job. We fought again, and I told her that this would mean we only stop hemorrhaging money on the house. We will be able to save only a little and would still not be close to refilling our 401Ks. Kids, the whole reason we got this damn house, would be entirely off the table,” he continued.
During a recent dinner with his in-laws, when his wife’s mom told her parents about his new job, her mom made a comment about him hopefully not “complaining about money” anymore.
“I don’t know why I said it, but I replied with, ‘Oh, don’t worry, Jen. I won’t have to worry about money a year from now because we’ll be divorced by then.’ Things got quiet real quick after, and I excused myself. Her parents left shortly after, and she slept on the couch to avoid talking to me,” he shared, adding their relationship has been tense since his cruel comment.
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Users in the comments told the man that divorce is nothing to joke about.
“It’s what I always tell people. It’s not a joke, it’s not a threat, it’s the beginning of the end. My mom used to threaten my dad with divorce. He said fine, and filed the papers,” one person wrote.
“My ex threatened me for years. Until I served him with divorce papers. At that point I was so done I couldn’t stand him,” another commented.
“My soon to be ex-stepfather, who is my mother’s childhood sweetheart, basically admitted he was going to divorce her over the house he had nothing invested in while they were relaxing in the hot tub, basically out of nowhere. Mom didn’t say a word, but gave him the boot the next day. The divorce should be finalized within a month,” someone else shared.
