DEAR MISS MANNERS: Fifteen years ago, I received a ring as a birthday gift from my boyfriend at the time. He insisted on giving me a diamond cocktail ring, but I was firm on its being a gift only -- not a promise or any kind of engagement. (I didn’t want to be in such a relationship since I had just left an abusive marriage.)
We broke up two years after that, and had absolutely no contact from then on. Move forward to today, and I have found out that he passed away.
The ring doesn’t mean much to me aside from being beautiful, and I don’t wear it anymore. I’m wondering about giving it to his daughter.
Is this something that “should” occur, or should I just let it sit in my jewelry box? I am not even sure if she would like it. What is correct in this situation?
GENTLE READER: The ring belongs to you. Since it is unlikely that the daughter knows of its existence (and it might invite suspicion as to how serious the relationship actually was), Miss Manners sees no reason why you “should” give it to her. Except that it would be extremely kind.
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(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
