Billy Porter is “having a rebirth” after processing his childhood trauma.
The ‘Pose’ star has said he’s finally found ways to come to terms with the trauma he endured as a child, and is now “getting to the deepest parts” of his “truth”.
He said: “At 52 years old, I am getting to the deepest parts of my truth. I’m having a rebirth - on my own terms.”
Billy was a target for bullying at a young age, and says his mother didn’t take him seriously when he spoke to her about it.
He added: “My Black queerness made everyone uncomfortable. [My mom would just say] ‘They crucified Jesus, baby. You’ll be fine.’”
The 52-year-old actor’s mother remarried when he was seven, and he was then sexually abused by his stepfather several times a week over a period of five years.
He explained: “As a child, I became a grown man. In my mind, I lived that experience as if it was an affair. Because it was loving, it was nurturing, it was confusing. Because it was touch. It was what I needed; it was the illusion of care, of a big, strong man caring for me. Still, to this day, I’m not okay.”
Billy began seeking therapy at 25, and although he later gave it up, he sought help once again during the COVID-19 pandemic last year.
He told People magazine: “My sex life in relation to intimacy, it’s not — it’s not good at all. It’s really, really hard in a marriage, you know, when you’re trying to figure out how to be intimate with somebody. But we’re growing together and healing together. It’s a lot of hard work. Let me say, it’s worth it.”
Meanwhile, Billy – who revealed earlier this year he was diagnosed as HIV positive 14 years ago – recently said his role as Pray Tell in 'Pose' helped him "heal" from his "trauma and grief".
He said: "What I understood from day one was that I could use Pose and the character of Pray Tell in proxy for my own healing and my own journey with trauma and grief as it relates to that time period.
"One of the things that has stuck out for me about the whole thing is a lot of my older friends were calling and saying, 'Oh, I didn't know that I had anything left to process.'"
