The After Calendar: 50+ power, when 'women of a certain age' come out of the shadows to take center stage

By Dmitry Belyaev / Getty Images

Active, creative, powerful, and above all, alive and vibrant... Women in their 50s and beyond are no longer staying in the shadows, no longer keeping quiet, and they're determined to obliterate all the stereotypes surrounding this supposedly 'difficult' age that has long been sidelined. The watchword is freedom, but true emancipation requires that we successfully put an end to the countless old-fashioned views about women this age – both aesthetic and societal – that persist. Let's say it once and for all, getting older is not about fading away or retreating, it's about getting out there and living. A chapter in our After Calendar, our 2023 trend book.

Active, creative, powerful, and above all, alive and vibrant... Women in their 50s and beyond are no longer staying in the shadows, no longer keeping quiet, and they're determined to obliterate all the stereotypes surrounding this supposedly 'difficult' age that has long been sidelined. The watchword is freedom, but true emancipation requires that we successfully put an end to the countless old-fashioned views about women this age – both aesthetic and societal – that persist. Let's say it once and for all, getting older is not about fading away or retreating, it's about getting out there and living. A chapter in our After Calendar, our 2023 trend book.

In France, one advertising campaign drew significant attention last year. Plastered on walls, in bus shelters, or on the internet, it features a woman in lingerie – bra and panties, with a haughty bearing and a mischievous smile, confidently looking into the camera. It could be like so many other ads if the body in the images was younger. But it’s not. On the contrary, it is a genuine, authentic, not-photoshopped body that has witnessed six decades of existence. The ad in question features Caroline Ida Ours, a 62-year-old model who lends her features to the latest Darjeeling campaign. Women aged 50 and over are having a revolution, and the world of media and advertising needs to keep pace.

As soon as the campaign went live, a flood of comments appeared praising the image, as well as a flood of trolling, even hateful remarks. "Some women told me that it bothered them to see me everywhere ... with my fat, my cellulite, my gray hair... Some wrote to me 'How dare you show a body like that?' My answer to them is 'that's life! To grow old,'" Caroline Ida Ours said in an interview with French magazine Télé Star last July. This discomfort with aging, this expiry date that the collective unconscious has decided to fix at the age of 50, sweeps through all the societal expectations that millions of women are trying to break down every day, just like the sexagenerian model, expectations which are intrinsically linked to society’s obsession for youthfulness and its tendency to devalue women as soon as they show the first signs of menopause.

Stopping outdated clichés

This 'silver revolution,' as it could be called, comes at a time when the conversation about menopause is opening up, and certain clichés associated with this period of life are being broken down, starting with the one that would have us believe that a woman is only desirable as long as she is able to have children. Some stereotypes are still alive and well of course, but a more open discourse on the subject in the media and on social networks, combined with shifts in family configurations, are helping to free women in their 50s from these shackles. One need only look at the headlines in women’s magazines to notice a shift... Libido, dating and sexual encounters of women in their 50s now figure prominently as do issues of personal development, topics that were unthinkable for this age group a few years ago. "There’s already been quite a bit of progress regarding subjects linked to the female body, whether about menstruation or maternity, and the time has now come for 50-somethings to launch this revolution when it comes to menopause. This is a generation that dares to speak out, that says it wants a different life and can no longer bear societal oppressions," emphasizes Mélissa Petit, a France-based doctor of sociology, specializing in seniors and the challenges of aging, and founder of the research and consulting firm Mixing Generations.*

But is it enough? For 50-somethings to inhabit their rightful space, it also seems essential to break down the perpetual quest for eternal youth. "Women’s aging is still overly associated with unattractiveness and letting oneself go. It illustrates our society’s obsession with youth and youthfulness, with bodies that are younger than 30. Our countries are aging at full speed, we are societies of elderly people who don’t own their age and refuse to see themselves as they really are," explains French journalist and novelist Marie Charrel, author of the essay ‘Qui a Peur des Vieilles ? ('Who’s afraid of aging women?) '**.

How can a group of people avoid becoming invisible if they aren’t given real representation in society? Dyed hair, youthful bodies, and hidden wrinkles are legion in the media, even when the subject is none other than 50-somethings. "This is an illustration of the contradictory and unbearable societal expectations placed upon women. Grow old, sure, but be sure to stay beautiful, thin, and free of most of the visible signs of aging," adds Marie Charrel. And if lockdowns succeeded at bringing gray hair out of the shadows, it’s still necessary to go even further so that aging is no longer shorthand for deterioration of the body. This is all the more important when you consider that in France, life expectancy at birth for women, which was 69 years in 1950, has increased by more than 15 years to 85.7 years in 2019, according to INSEE, France’s National Institute of Statistics and Economic Studies.

"We are a society that prioritizes youth, with a very narrow definition of youthfulness, meaning those aged 20-35, linked to the notion of a youthful body. It's absurd, as soon as we deviate slightly from this idea of youth we feel uncomfortable. It’s evident in the names of some cosmetics. Look at 'anti-aging skincare'... It's telling us to go against age, but age is life. We must not confuse being young with being alive," says Natacha Dzikowski, head of a consulting company and author of the blog “50 ans, c'est super” (50 is great) and of two books on personal development***.

Powerful role models

In 2008, American photographer Ari Seth Cohen launched the Instagram account "Advanced Style," which focuses on celebrating the style of those aged 60 and over, and which aims to demonstrate that style has no age. While the account has met with huge success, it hasn’t exactly spawned a larger movement. However it’s an important step in that it is such representations that help drive change, provided that they (truly) resemble the target audience they address. "We need role models who help women liberate themselves and reclaim power," says Mélissa Petit. And, to quote the book "Une apparition" by Sophie Fontanel, dedicated to gray hair, "which help women own their identities."

Jennifer Lopez, Naomi Campbell, Cindy Crawford, Carla Bruni, and Andie MacDowell are among the women who have passed the famous 50-year mark and who are changing the game. Some don’t hold back about showing off their gray hair, while others have no complexes about revealing their bodies in bikinis, ignoring the gaze of others. But do other, 'real' 50+ women actually identify with these celebrities? "There are all these former models, it's true, but they’re exceptions, and I’m not sure that image speaks to everyone because they’re not exactly representative. I have the impression that it remains somewhat caricatural, but it is gradually opening up," says Natacha Dzikowski.

Some of the first areas to reflect societal change are fashion, cinema, and TV shows, and there are many examples here of attempts, though sometimes clumsy, to deconstruct clichés around age. Gone are the retirees, who wait at home, with a cake and a freshly knitted sweater, for the arrival of their offspring at the traditional family dinner. Now it’s the 50-somethings who are in command, liberated and sexy, who are taking the lead. Take, for example, Viola Davis, who plays a renowned lawyer in "How to Get Away with Murder," Sandra Oh, an MI-5 agent in "Killing Eve," Gillian Anderson, a therapist and sexologist, whose late pregnancy gets tongues wagging in "Sex Education," or Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu, a sexy and powerful boss who nearly relegates the title character of "Emily in Paris" to the role of an extra.

In onscreen fictional content, there are an increasing number of examples of portrayals that push back against ageism and invisibility -- even the total absence of roles for this age group, which was the case for generations. There is finally some justice for actresses and women who have been stereotyped, desexualized, or even cast into the background once they reach their 40s. And it’s no longer about making their characters younger or ignoring some of the problems encountered around the age of 50, as seen in “Better Things,” which follows the daily life of Sam Fox, played by Pamela Adlon, as a single mother. Fictional examples reinforced by real-life role models. No less powerful and inspiring, it’s also become more common in recent years for journalists, businesswomen and independent entrepreneurs, to name but a few, to speak out on the desire -- and need -- of women in their 50s to advance in their careers, remain active, and even start new projects. Michelle Obama has emphasized this through the promotional tour of her book "The Light We Carry," debunking misconceptions and reminding brands – in passing -- that it’s the “older ones” who control the purse strings, despite an economic crisis that may affect them disproportionately. Significant purchasing power which is not unconnected to this increased visibility.

These role models, through their actions and their words, contribute, in their domains, to making women aged 50 and over visible, and by providing, in particular, examples of strong, powerful, active, creative and liberated women, for younger generations to see. Something that should help them construct their own authentic identities and to grow older without fear of being forgotten. "It’s necessary to show the place that women over 50 really occupy in society: without them, everything collapses. Many of them – without generalizing, of course -- say that they feel better about themselves than they did at 20, more confident, more sure of what they’re capable of and what they want, including in intimate relationships. They often say they also feel freer….This freedom, this feeling of finally being oneself: that's what we need to talk about! Especially to young women. It’s much more powerful and more interesting than talking about wrinkles," outlines Marie Charrel.

Age is just a number

"'At your age, you shouldn't be doing/wearing/saying that.' In the collective imagination, there’s an ‘appropriate’ age for wearing one type of jeans rather than another, for doing one type of activity rather than another, and even for speaking -- or remaining silent -- in a certain way. A sort of expiry date, a deadline, after which everything must be meticulously organized in order to avoid ‘stepping out of line.’ An idea that can only result in the exclusion of those concerned. Much like a very reductive, limited definition of the term and category of ‘seniors,’ further reducing the visibility of individuals. ‘Senior' is a very broad term for a very diverse population. The more we use precise terminology, the better our visibility of the target will be, enabling us to break away from taboos. Such imprecision corresponds to a kind of discomfort of a world which is rather ageist, and which even if it's making progress on questions of invisibilization, draws comfort from concrete examples of unconscious stereotypes," explains Mélissa Petit.

To this must be added a subtle distinction between chronological age and physiological age, which is a matter of perception. Can we not feel old at 30, and younger than ever at 50? According to Natacha Dzikowski, this is largely due to lifestyle. "Once you understand how to use your body and put in place what you need to slow down its deterioration, you have control over your biological age. You can program or reprogram your age," explains the author of “J’ai l’âge que je veux !” ("I'm the age I want to be"), who goes through six approaches for making the most of one's body and mind. The ultimate goal is to love oneself, to live in one's body free from complexes, and to no longer fear the passing years. To reach that point, it’s essential to build up significant levels of self-confidence in order to be able to confront the forces of ostracization and resist them – for as long as they remain in place.

"We can get through it alright as long as we have a certain clarity about the world in which we live. Age 50 is a pivotal point, it's a milestone, because we can be in the midst of professional challenges, children may be leaving the family home, we may be questioning our marriage... We face a certain number of moments of imbalance, doubt, change. But what is sure is that it is the work one does on oneself that allows one to be free, and not to suffer from the burden, the charges imposed by society and others," adds Natacha Dzikowski.

This 'silver revolution' will therefore require personal development on the individual level, a change of mentality on a collective basis, and a thorough deconstruction of societal expectations placed on women, regardless of their age, but that’s not all: "There could be training and workshops for those who create advertisements, for example, to help them deconstruct their own stereotypes on age, whether conscious or unconscious, so that they no longer reproduce these stereotypes in media," suggests Mélissa Petit. She adds: "We must continue to show women of all ages in all their social and physical representations to highlight the issue in the media.”

This process is still in its infancy and will undoubtedly take time, but the time has come for revolution. "It is in the long run that things will evolve. It's not just a flash in the pan. It requires determination, consistency, keeping up the pressure, and not letting up in any area. It's an ongoing daily struggle," says Natacha Dzikowski, who explains that one of the keys to coping with it is also flexibility, adaptability, and accepting the need to continuously learn and change. However, like any large-scale change, it is likely to come up against many obstacles before it takes hold in society. "We are approaching a 'silver revolution,' but it is not certain that it will last. Like all feminist breakthroughs, there’s always the potential of society taking a step backwards, and progress remains fragile," points out Marie Charrel. Powerful, dynamic, and more than ever determined to make their presence known, the 50+ crowd seem well-armed to lead this fight in order to prevent future generations from becoming invisible as they age..

Author of “Les retraités : cette richesse pour la France” (“Retirees: a source of weatlh for France”) - Editions L'Harmattan (2016)*

* “Qui a peur des vieilles ?” (“Who’s afraid of aging women?”) - Editions Les Pérégrines (2021)*

** "Belle & bien dans son âge"(“Looking good and feeling well, whatever one’s age”) and “J'ai l'âge que je veux !” (I’m the Age I Want to Be”) - Editions Leduc (2021 & 2023).*

This article has been translated from French.

The After Calendar:

"Better, differently, less" took on even greater meaning in 2022. In a world turned upside down by climate change, inflation and the energy crisis, sobriety is the order of the day, in our closets, our travel planning and our food prep. And this is not necessarily all bad news. Because sobriety can be accompanied by mindfulness, creativity and even unexpected joy. That's why our 2023 trends examine the pleasure of quitting something; the new lazy aesthetic; when AI takes on the artistic realm; yeast as an ingredient on the rise; and a future where we're all energy producers; as well as of course our glossary of 23 words that we'll be using in 2023... Find all the trends in the 2023 After Calendar.... Enjoy your reading.

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