‘HELLO, JOE! I JUST CALLED TO COMPLAIN ABOUT JOE’
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have been mortified, twice, by close friends while talking on the phone. They each told a story about another friend who repeatedly annoys them with a certain behavior. It was only later that I realized they were talking about me!
What does Miss Manners think of this way of criticizing a friend?
GENTLE READER: That your friends are not as smart as they think they are.
Miss Manners wonders how they would respond to option 1 -- “Oh my goodness, you’re talking about me! I had no idea that annoyed you! I am so, so very sorry! Please accept my apologies! I am mortified!” repeating yourself until they cringe in embarrassment -- or option 2: “That is completely annoying! How can you stand such a person! Incredible!” and on and on, continuing not to let on that you realize it is you until their heads explode.
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(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
