DEAR ABBY: I’m divorced. My ex-husband has a girlfriend and has just gotten engaged. We have two sons, 23 and 20, and they are going to their father’s wedding in four months. I’m kind of annoyed that they are going, and I’m not sure what an impact this will have on my life as the “ex” or how my boys will feel. Advice? -- NEW ERA IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR NEW ERA: If it isn’t too late, refrain from conveying to your sons your annoyance that they will attend their father’s wedding. They belong there. Give them the chance to get to know the woman without trying to influence them either way.
Remember, above all, that you are a person in your own right, rather than just an “ex.” You are also still your sons’ mom. You have the opportunity for a happy, successful future if you don’t allow bitterness to get in the way. I hope you will give yourself that gift.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
