DEAR ANNIE: I’ve recently reconnected with my old high school friend, “Amy,” after losing touch for nearly a decade. We’ve started hanging out regularly, and it’s been wonderful catching up. But I’ve noticed that Amy often borrows money and never pays it back. She always has an excuse, like her paycheck being delayed or an unexpected expense popping up. I want to help her, but it’s starting to strain my own finances.
I’m torn because I don’t want to lose this rekindled friendship, but I also don’t want to feel taken advantage of. Should I continue lending her money, or is it time to set some boundaries? I’m not sure how to bring it up without making things awkward. -- Conflicted in Ohio
DEAR CONFLICTED IN OHIO: It’s wonderful that you’ve reconnected with your old friend, but it’s important to set boundaries. Lending money can complicate friendships, especially if repayment isn’t happening as promised.
First, have an honest conversation with Amy. Let her know that while you value her friendship, you simply can’t afford to keep lending her money without being repaid.
If she’s truly in a financial bind, maybe you can offer to help her find resources or budget better. This shows you’re still there for her without compromising your own financial stability. If she resists, you might do well to lose touch with her all over again.
Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.
