DEAR ABBY: My 11-year-old grandson, “Lucas,” and I are very close. His mother (my daughter) allowed me to have him any time I wanted. I would even take him on vacation with me. When he was going into first grade, his mom informed me she was going into rehab, so he started living with me. Lucas is now in sixth grade and back living with his mom.
My daughter has two other boys and lives with their father. Lucas’ dad is not in his life. I have always been there for him. She isn’t a bad mom, but Lucas doesn’t like living with her. My daughter now plans to move 40 minutes away and transfer Lucas to a new school. I’m very worried for him. I’m the reason he has a social life. He has been in Boy Scouts with the same boys for five years. What am I to do? Let him go? -- BESIDE MYSELF IN SOUTH CAROLINA
DEAR BESIDE MYSELF: Unless you can convince your daughter to agree to allow Lucas to stay with you so he can remain socially active with his peer group, I think you have no choice but to let him go. Sixth and seventh grades are a difficult time for a child to start a new school because cliques have usually formed by then. You are a caring grandparent, and I wish you luck. Start campaigning now.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
