Ask Amy: I thought I was okay with our non-monogamous relationship, it turns out I’m not

Amy Dickinson, known as Ask Amy, answers a question about a non-monogamous relationship.

DEAR AMY: I’ve been seeing/sleeping with my friend “Curtis” off and on for a few months. We have what I would describe as a non-monogamous sort of “friends with benefits” relationship.

Sometimes we hang out, sometimes we go out, but we are not “a couple.”

I’m completely fine with this, and I thought he was, too.

Recently, Curtis told me that he was going to start seeing someone else, also casually.

Now I’m feeling weird and possessive. I don’t want him to be exclusive to me, but I don’t want for things to change. I don’t want him to do this.

Do you think it’s okay for me to tell him this?

– At Odds

DEAR AT ODDS: If you can have sex with someone, then yes – surely you can be brave enough to initiate a conversation.

Yes, I think it’s always okay to tell someone how you feel, and I hope you will.

However, you also need to accept that life equals change.

Everyone involved needs to make sure that all of this casual sex you’re having is also safe.

(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

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