Dear Abby: The pull-out sofa no longer seems like a good option for my visiting elderly in-laws

Dear Abby, written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, answers a question about where elderly in-laws should stay when visiting.

DEAR ABBY: My in-laws live 90 minutes away, so when they visit, they usually stay with us for a night or two. I don’t mind hosting them. They are delightful people, and we always have a good time. However, now that they’re getting older, I’m wondering what the etiquette is for sleeping arrangements.

We don’t have a guest bedroom, so they sleep on a pullout sofa with a pillow topper. While they’ve never mentioned it, I know it’s not all that comfy, and I know they have some age-related aches and pains. When my grandparents stayed with us when I was a kid, they usually slept in my sister’s double bed, and she slept on the floor in the room I shared with my other sister.

Would offering my in-laws my son’s double bed be a good idea going forward? (Something about offering the master bedroom seems weird.) I’m fortunate to have great in-laws and would like to do right by them. It’s just a night or two, after all. What would you recommend I do? -- COMFORT CREATURE IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR COMFORT CREATURE: Ask your in-laws whether they would be more comfortable if you changed their sleeping arrangements. If they say yes, have a chat with your son, explain the problem and tell him you want him to sleep on the pullout sofa bed when his grandparents are visiting.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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