Gone are the days when commitment was an unspoken rule of a romantic relationship. Daters in today’s world aren’t big on promises thanks to digital platforms and dating apps. One swipe is all it takes to make someone feel replaceable.
It’s another thing if you wish not to commit to someone owing to your reasons, which is understandable. But attracting the wrong kind of daters with hopes of commitment isn’t a deliberate choice people in their right minds would make. If you fall into the latter category, dating coach Matthew Hussey suggests tweaking your mindset.
4 qualities that attract men with commitment issues
Firstly, you must understand that lack of commitment in a relationship doesn’t equate to issues with you or your partner. There are plenty of reasons one may not want to commit – a traumatic past, different views about life, or simply because they want to play the field.
So, the dating coach’s advice isn’t to pinpoint flaws in you or anybody else. They should rather be treated as effective tools to better your life and the relationship you desire.
Have a positive outlook on love and commitment
If you wish to build a relationship with a man scared of commitment, you must believe in the concept yourself.
Only by being positive about a healthy and exclusive relationship, can you attract people with similar intentions. This can also influence someone who isn’t pleased by the idea of commitment.
Be vulnerable
Showing your vulnerabilities doesn’t make you weak. In fact, it’s powerful to build trust. If you wish to be in a serious relationship, it’s important to let your guard down.
This is comforting to a person with commitment issues due to a traumatic past as they get to see you for who you truly are and maybe, it encourages them to be vulnerable too.
Set clear boundaries
Boundaries are so important in any interpersonal relationship. Only you know your worth and there is nothing more attractive than being vocal about it.
It’s a human tendency to take someone for granted if they come with poor boundaries. If you seek commitment, be loud and clear about your expectations.
Create peace
Most people unwilling to commit come with baggage and they would do anything to avoid reliving their traumatic past.
If a person is scared to commit due to an experience they dread the most, make the opposite possible by creating a sense of peace when they are around you.
Matthew Hussey is a popular British dating and relationship coach. He’s best known for his series ‘Get The Guy’ on YouTube as well as his podcast, which he uses to help women navigate relationships and dating lives. He’s the New York Times bestselling author and has appeared in television shows including Ready for Love, So Cosmo, and The Single Wives among others.
